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Data Entry Earth Date: 10.19.12
Data Entry Earth Time: 11:55 pm
To: Commander Quasar
From: Una Verse
Heh, heh, heh..we have these earthlings so fooled. First off, I am included with a glow-in-the-dark stand that cannot be in direct sunlight for any amount of time, or the stand will not glow anymore. What kid or hassled caretaker will remember to stow the stand away to avoid this pitfall? Even my notes on the stand are oxymoronish: "Glow-in-the-dark feature has a lengthy but limited lifespan". And confusing: "The longer the exposure to light, the more and longer the stand will glow." Ha! Did I mention the back tips of my boots? The humans better watch out...they are sharp enough to inflict pain...hmmm...maybe I should have been more sutble. My left arm falls off every six minutes, and replacement is futile. Heck, it was even unconnected to my torso before I was removed from my plastic hibernation pod. My necklace is so strange that even the mother-figure is wary of removal. Yes, attachment of unnecessary Velcro to hard, tight plastic is unheard of on Earth. My long eyelashes trap stray hairs in my face so that I look constantly disheveled. My mascot was designed by a comrade who failed art school. Yes, yes, the headband...my packaging handle can be transformed into a headband that possesses no beauty. It is slightly uncomfortable and has unsightly pegs on the side that enabled the headband to be held to the packaging rods and said pegs cannot be removed. Of course this headband performs mind control! Do I look like an idiot? O.K., O.K., you got me there...Anyway, earth-mom has suggested nine times that earth-child should take me back to retail establishment, but earth-child refuses. Any potential enjoyment has been nullified. Plan is in effect. Nocturnal slumbering is imminent. Ha, ha!
Added Human Data (11/2/12): We brought Una back to Target on 10/25/12, nine days after obtaining her. Her packaging was in shambles, so do not be dissuaded by that fact if you are considering returning her. We have been burned before by poorly constructed toys, so I now keep all receipts on my fridge for three months max, and I keep the packaging until I am sure the toy is a keeper. I swear that I heard her cursing me as I left my husband to dismiss her from our solar system. Thanks for the votes!
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Like other people have said, the packaging....ugh. I worked up a sweat and a few choice words getting her out. Arms fell off right away. My daughter is 8.5 and very careful of her toys. So much so, that at night she takes the dolls arm off so it won't be lost in the morning. Notice i said arm, as in singular, because as careful as she was, she still lost an arm. We have wasted HOURS looking for it, but since it is see through and less than 2 inches, it was impossible. She still plays with her, even though she only has 1 arm. How sad. I spend 18.00 on it, and it was junk coming out of the package....arm lost after 1 DAY. Biggest rip off ever. And it's too bad, because she really is an adorable doll.
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